B Sqn 22 SAS have a long running game involving a small but rather heavy cannon ball they call the ‘pill’. The object of the game is to smuggle the pill into the unsuspecting victim’s bergen, obliging him to carry the extra weight. Once discovered, you are left carrying this unwelcome burden until you can find an opportunity to smuggle it into someone else’s pack. All the while, complete secrecy is to be maintained – you cannot acknowledge having the pill.
It passes the time! The pill came to mind recently as a metaphor because I found myself angry with a team member. Angry enough not to be able to fall asleep as I lay thinking about it. The pill came to mind because it occurred to me that I had similar choices. I could hang on to the anger and continue to be burdened with it, carrying it around as a useless lump. I could hand it back by expressing the anger to my teammate, which would be futile given that it would probably make them angry in turn and, since the action and its consequence was passed, there was nothing they could usefully do with the information. Finally, I could choose to set it aside and walk on without the burden.
Anger can occasionally be a useful emotion that motivates and drives positive action but more often it’s just a burden. We hang on to it to everyone’s detriment.
As Voltaire said, ‘The most important decision you make is to be in a good mood’. Easy to say, hard to do but crucial for leaders who most positively influence the mood and energy of the team.